She’s Not There


Every time I think about my neglect of this here blog thang, the tune above is what comes to mind except, instead of being all lit on illicit drugs and shit, I’ve been strung out on sunshine and leafy green things and probs a bunch of wine, but mostly not sitting in front of glowing screens.

Work demand has been a bit nutty of late, which is extremely great because I like money…or, I don’t much like money, but I like earning a living that also affords me to live as comfortably as the squirrels in my backyard live. Which is to say pretty damned comfortably.

So yeah, avoidance of glowing screens in favour of glowing orbs has been de rigueur.

I’m all tan and shit.

And it’s only June the sixth!

Most of my attention has been put toward growing stuff – edibles and not-so-edibles – in the back 40.

My wee balcony is in full sun almost all day and my little figgy friend, who has been in that very spot since we moved and who I had to cosset a bunch by wrapping him in a sleeping bag through the cold bits in April and May because we just did not have room for him inside the box-filled apartment, is stupendously happy there now:

In the pot below the fig tree is a banana plant in recovery and…stuff.

Look, I take inspiration from squirrels a lot in my life, so why not gardening? There was a day, it was sunny, there were seeds and pots and bulbs and corms and dirt and they all kinda got flung together.

I’m pretty sure those are orchid lilies coming up behind the banana plant and that the larger I seedlings in front are most certainly borage.

I’ve just tasted it. Yes: borage.

Who knows what else? Only time will tell…


A lot of the usuals do or will (fingers crossed) make an appearance.

That’s basil and a million leafy greens.

And there’s oregano and a million leafy greens. there are some wee cilantro seedlings coming up in the other end of that planter, too.

Purple basil and sage and lavender and more borage and summer savoury and chives and a miniature rose plant because pretty.

Thymes and more lavender and some indoor plants and two of the 2937 pots of morning glory I have on the go.

I gotta talk about this pot rack contraption, though:

A) I know my pot rack, among other very Mel-esque items and MOs, is a thing that folks totally associate with Mel’s kitchen and Mel food, so many have been aghast at the idea that I would re-purpose it in such a way.

Rest assured, dear hearts, that this pot rack is not my pot rack. This pot rack we found abandoned in a closet by previous tenants and it is not nearly as nice as mine, but is still a very lovely pot rack, indeed.

So, if you’re reading this and were a previous tenant who may have left this pot rack, I thank you very much! It is being put to good use! Should you like it back, we may to go all fisty-cuffs over it because…

B) This is such a cute little project for which I have high hopes. Our balcony is basically a glorified fire escape in that it’s all open metal, despite being balcony-sized. As such, it should lend itself well to allowing climbing plants to do their thing…I think?

I don’t know! This is why I pray to the squirrel gods!

Most of the plant action is happening on the outside of the rails so we’re not obstructing any paths in and out of the apartment.

It has been suggested that I should not boast about my little garden in my glorified fire escape on the social medias lest the fuzz be set upon me and I resent the notion that I would be stupid enough to put my wee fam in danger (I shan’t even get into just how many assumptions are being made by people with far more resources than I about what kinds of resources I, as an apartment dweller, have/can afford because that would make me ill with contempt) just to keep plants.

I am nothing if not someone who embraces creative limitations, but I also want things to not be dangeuresque, so this puppy is well-secured with not very pretty wire so’s not to drop on anyone’s head, but in such a way that you can barely tell that it’s not-very-prettily-secured. Also: NO PATHS OBSTRUCTED.


I’m proud of that and glad that I have a shadier spot to nurse some of my indoor plants that could use the photosynthesis boost but won’t tolerate the kind of sun the balcony gets.

Special thanks to my super-rad downstairs neighbours for allowing me to encroach upon their part of the stairway space in that way. More on that in another post.

My good, old, reliable IKEA plant-stand-thing that I purchased in the early days of my last home continues to serve its purpose:

On it are the tomatoes I have yet to properly plant up in containers that will go in the way back, plus a bunch more morning glory and scarlet runner beans I have ideas for. The box has more sage, some chamomile and Thai basil.

Speaking of scarlet runner beans: Mine are just a couple of weeks old and already rail training!

Hashtag proudmama!


As I plant garden stuff in garden spaces, as opposed to the plant stand thing, room is made for some of my indoor bébés to come out and play. The bottom bit, as always, is reserved for the recycling box. It’s kinda funny how some things carry on like that.

Kinda accidentally, this year, I am growing all of the mints.

There is spearmint and peppermint:

There’s chocolate mint and ginger mint (and a little lemon balm tucked in there):


Because I have no self-restraint, but I have been defending my habit by coming up with all kinds of recipes that will use them funky mints in delicious ways which I will share when I get bored of my garden, which will never happen so I guess this blog is sunk.

But guyyyyyyyyys, every time I get to go out there and pick a few (or a lot) leaves of this and that to add to our meals. And I have SO much vision for the space that I’m reluctant to share it all here, but cannot wait for things to fill in and out and become themselves.

I will post what I’m doing with them soon, I promise, but should you need me in the meantime, know that I’m just outside getting all sun drunk with my plant posse.

And what are YOU growing? Spill it because garden season is, like, a metric pantload more exciting to me than Christmas and I LOVE Christmas.



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